"No, I want you to come after me, this is a bummer!" When parents hear something like this on the other end of the phone, we don't really know what to expect. "Shall we rush out to pick up our troubled son?"; "Shall we wait for it to pass?" "What if it doesn't go away?"
First of all, calm down: many children go through it, especially first-timers, and even veterans can have a silly day and miss their little house, like E.T.
Learning to separate takes time
The moment of farewell is usually a recurring image for the child throughout the trip. If we give him the impression of being very worried, he will think, scared, that terrible dangers await him.
It is normal for us all to be a little sad; there is no reason to hide it. Let's tell him that we are also sad to part with him, but that we are sure he will have a great time.
Giving him a thousand pieces of advice just before leaving will do no good, except to make him nervous ("Will I remember everything?"). It is better to make preparations with it and, if necessary, write down ideas that may be useful to you in a notebook.
Arrival at the camp is always a bit chaotic: backpacks here, distracted children... In some centers they take advantage of that time to do some recreational activity in order to break the ice of the first moments.
The first two days are the most difficult. He still doesn't know the place or his friends well, and that's when he misses his parents the most (the food is different, they miss the bed, Rufo doesn't come to lick him awake every morning...). The most cuddly ones get sick with homesickness and want to return home at all costs. But the monitors are warned and they come up with a lot of games... and love and understanding to help them get over the hump.
Some children are more susceptible than others to being homesick: shyness, difficulty making friends, difficult situations at home or moments of change (a recent divorce, a change of house or school...). Also children who suffer from a chronic illness (asthma) or a possible medical problem (enuresis) need more attention than others and feel insecure when their parents are not around. We must ask for the collaboration of the monitors and explain to them (if applicable) the special care that our child will need during those days.
Visiting the camp in advance will help you avoid so many new things when you land. Talking to him about his expectations (helping him adjust them to reality) and explaining to him that it is normal for us all to miss each other at first will, without a doubt, help him cope better with the change.
The parents, speaking
Most centers have their own policies about phone calls and visits. The ideal is to have a contact person (the monitor or someone in charge of that function) who keeps parents informed whenever they need it and advises them on the right time to call. Typically, each center establishes specific hours or days of the week. Outside this period, calls are not accepted, unless the child requests it or it is something urgent.
The objective of these restrictions is none other than to promote the correct adaptation of the children. "During the first days they are making a great effort to integrate: they get to know an environment other than the city, they make friends with other children, they adapt to the routine of the camp activities... A visit or a call from home at that time can interrupt the process and precipitate nostalgia for their daily life," explains Elena Carballal, coordinator of the Greenpeace Camp.
Let's not infect him with our 'neura'
If we want to share every moment with him, we can ask him to write to us telling us everything he does or to make a diary to read together when he returns home.
Many times we are the parents themselves who are homesick: if they will sleep well, if they will not forget the medicine, if they will spend too much time alone... It is very important to trust the monitors (and the boy or girl) and learn to manage our fears so as not to transmit them to them.
In calls for help, you have to know how to interpret between the lines. Phrases like "The food is disgusting" or "The children here are all idiots" are typical in these cases. Offering him solutions is better than showing him our concern: suggesting that he share his feelings with the monitors, showing him the positive side of things ("At home you can't ride a bike every day") or reminding him of previous triumphs ("Do you remember that time you spent a whole weekend at your uncles' house? In the end you had a great time").
Surely he will return home saying that he had a great time. Let's listen to him carefully and take note: next year he will want to come back!
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