'No one told me that instinct teaches you to be a mother' 2026

How many times have we mentioned that life after fatherhood or motherhood is totally different from what we knew until that moment? Having a child involves many changes, a lot of effort and, above all, a very strong mentality that allows you to know all the responsibility you will have from that moment on.

The moms and dads we have around us usually tell us about some of the changes that parenthood brings with it. But, some are so incredible that it is difficult for us to settle them in our heads and think that one day they could be reality.

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No one believes that after having a baby life as a couple can change, no one understands all the changes that the body undergoes in the postpartum period or how extremely difficult it is to breastfeed and not die trying.

For this reason, Gylisa Jane, a mother of a one and a half year old girl, has decided to share on her Facebook page a text with which she intends to make all mothers aware and, in addition, show them that they are not alone in this process, that we have all gone through the same thing and that, although these changes may affect our lives, they are still temporary.

The text makes it clear that, although cookies and tea become the greatest daily companions, the little one's tantrums sometimes become unbearable or that the body will never be the same again, it is true that after arguing with the partner, watching the little one play makes all the bad things go away.

She decided to illustrate the text with an image of her shaving her legs and her little one in the middle to make it clear that “she will never be alone again.”

Her text, titled “The things that no one told me” has been shared more than 65 thousand times on Facebook, making it clear that she has come to keep company with many mothers who may have thought, at some point, that motherhood is something very complicated.

In it she refers to very common problems for all moms and dads. “No one told me that stitches in the vagina can hurt more than giving birth,” “no one told me that the side effects of pregnancy last for years,” or that “a baby can make your husband hate you sometimes.”

However, he also admits that "those feelings don't last forever. That sometimes you want to run away but everything gets better."

Additionally, she admits that she misses her little one even when he naps.

"There have been countless moments during my first year of motherhood when I have thought 'why hasn't anyone talked to me about this...!' Consultations with the midwife should be a thing of the past. They don't teach you anything that you can't see in videos, in Facebook posts or in a sex education class.

For example, no one told me that you can admit that you don't love your baby when he or she is pushing against you while inside your belly. Okay, I felt the same way when I saw the placenta in that cup and no, I didn't want to hug it.

No one told me that stitches in the vagina can be really painful (more so than giving birth to a 15-pound baby).

Nobody told me that breastfeeding hurts. Anyone who says otherwise is lying. Pain is a sign that your nipple is being absorbed. Getting started doing it right may take a week or two, but I swear it can be done. Then your partner can take cute photos of you smiling with your baby, instead of showing ones of you clenching your teeth in pain. Nobody told me that everyone could have an opinion about my baby (how I dress him, his name, how he eats, why I play rock for him, if you don't take care of him 24/7 you will be a shitty mother, he will be spoiled...) and so on.

No one told me I would never be alone again. This includes going to the bathroom, showering, and shaving. Especially when they get older and find it very interesting to shave your butt, leaving a scar for life.

Nobody told me that, once you get to be alone, you miss them even when they're sleeping because they're so cute. Oh God, are your eyes opening? Run now!

No one told me that the side effects of pregnancy last for years… so, we could say that you are pregnant for two years. Like an elephant (that's how fat I feel now).

No one told me that eating cookies and drinking tea would become a healthy diet. Because it's not, but they make you spend the day like that, so it doesn't matter.

No one told me that having a baby could make me hate my husband sometimes. That, sometimes, I would prefer a hug with our baby. That would feel unfair. But also, no one told me that seeing him touch/hug/look at our baby after fighting with him would make me feel full of happiness.

Nobody told me that, despite not knowing how to do any of this, instincts make you learn, that everyone improvises. Some people make it look easier. Looking at how other people do things shouldn't question my way of doing them.

No one told me you would be lonely after having the baby. No one told me so I felt like I couldn't tell anyone that I felt that way, until one day I decided to share my words with thousands of people. And you all have admitted it too. And then, you all told me that those feelings don't last forever. Sometimes they come back and you want to run away, but each and every one of them gets better. Everything becomes easier. Everything flies by and it's worth it.

And it’s not forever.”