I just became a mom! How to manage stress 2026

When mothers who have just become mothers write to me, there is a question that is repeated, that is why I have decided to talk to you about it. In many cases, mothers and fathers find themselves “lost” when they get home and this situation generates extra stress at a time that is usually complicated in itself.

The postpartum period is generally a difficult stage. On the one hand, we have a reason for great joy, which is the birth of our first child, and on the other hand, we find ourselves at the beginning of a new and unknown situation.

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The first advice I want to give you today is the following:

“Don't have excessive expectations in the first weeks after giving birth.”

What do I mean? In many cases we have been wanting to be parents for a long time, we have finally achieved it and it seems to us that we have no reason not to be 100%, but the reality when we get home is sometimes not idyllic, it is not what we had imagined.

During pregnancy, the mother is usually in very good spirits, she is happy about the imminent arrival of her baby, but after childbirth sometimes that feeling of well-being disappears. The postpartum period is a complicated stage in many cases, since we do not feel well physically or emotionally either.

The hormonal change that occurs after childbirth causes our mood to start at -10.

If we add to that that physically the most normal thing is that we find ourselves tired, sore and faced with a totally new situation, “the stress” is more than justified.

What can I do to better manage this new situation?

1. The first without a doubt is not to have excessive expectations.

If we have no expectations for these first weeks, our frustration will be much less. It is important to understand that the first weeks after giving birth should be like “A trial period.” Imagine that you have just started working in a new job. It is normal to have an adaptation period to learn to do your job correctly, right? The same thing happens after motherhood. You have just become a mother, and as is normal, your partner, your baby and you need a period of adaptation so that everything starts going smoothly.

There is a frequently repeated phrase in the postpartum period: “This is not how I had imagined it.” It is a feeling that usually disappears after a few weeks, but many times this feeling is generated by the excessive expectations that we had created for ourselves for these first weeks.

The 40 days postpartum are to recover, to be calm and “get into a rhythm.”

In many cases, the baby comes home without knowing when it is day and when it is night... For mothers who exclusively breastfeed, these first weeks are an extra challenge, since it is important to avoid cracks, mastitis and other possible complications.

The lack of restful hours of sleep can make you feel more tired than usual. All of this means that in many cases we mothers are more susceptible than usual and our partners also feel that they do not know how to help us so that we feel better.

2. Take the postpartum period as a period of adaptation.

I always say that it is the perfect time to help the people you love. When a mother is in the postpartum period, any little help is well received. Visits at home are fantastic, but be careful, sometimes we think that postpartum has to be a time where everyone comes to your house to have coffee and pastries and see the new member of the family...

Yes but no, what do I mean? It is a time when any type of selfless help is great. You visit yes, but you visit with confidence. Those people who don't care what state they see you in, because they come to help you.

I remember that my mother came with the tupperware of food prepared, gave me a kiss and asked me: “Daughter, do you need anything?” If I was alone he would stay with me for a while, if he saw that there were more people he would tell me: “I'll call you later and we'll talk.” Or when my friends came, for me it was a great moment, since I completely disconnected and they were the ones who brought the snack and even prepared the coffee.

Perhaps it is not the time to have courtesy visits, it is the time to have visits of love and affection.

3. It is important that you understand that ATTITUDE is everything and more in the postpartum.

The attitude towards life is very important, but it becomes even more important in the face of an adverse situation. In many of my talks I encourage moms and dads to listen to the “Lightbulb Effect: The Importance of Attitude” by Víctor Küppers. You can find it on You Tube, it is 5 minutes essential to understand what I am going to tell you now.

He summarizes life in a formula that is very accurate from my point of view: V= (C + H) x A

• The C: It is knowledge, what you have studied and learned, your academic training.
• The H: These are the skills that you learn over time.

These two factors, as you can see in the formula, add up, but there is a factor that multiplies and that is A: ATTITUDE.

And ATTITUDE is demonstrated when you find yourself in a complicated environment such as the postpartum period. That is where you have to show that, even if you are not at 100%, you are going to fight to feel better.

Why are you going to fight? Because it's worth it. Our project in CAPITAL LETTERS is our family, and that is where we have to put the rest.

Furthermore, there is something very important that we should not overlook, the state of mind can be worked on and that is perhaps the first responsibility as parents. It is important that you understand that, although you do not feel well, that feeling will change.

If your attitude is correct, you will be able to manage stress much better.

4. Lastly, I want to encourage you to ask for help.

During the postpartum period it seems that if we ask for help it is because we are not doing something right. On the contrary! The people who love you will be willing to help you, but in many cases they don't know how to do it.

Any small detail will be of great help, such as bringing you something you need, helping you pick up something or simply listening to you when you are not feeling well. The people who love you are eager to give you a hand, don't forget that.

Each child is different, there are easier children and there are more difficult children. And when you have two you will understand that they have nothing to do with each other, that each one belongs to his father and his mother, never better said...

But remember something: “Everything is seen from another perspective when it is done with the right attitude, don't forget it.”

Congratulations mom and go ahead!

Article written by Yolanda Vélaz from NadieComoMama. You can learn about her method, and follow her on social networks, such as Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

Video: Thank you, mom!