Is it okay for a child to have an imaginary friend? 2026

One afternoon, after the little one has spent the morning at preschool, you find yourself playing with him on the floor. Suddenly, she asks you to leave so that you can leave space for “Paola”, an invisible friend who now accompanies her in her room, and who lives in the forest. Indeed, it is an imaginary friend, and it is something absolutely normal, although it is true that at first it can scare us a little.

It is known that children's imagination begins to develop around 2-3 years of age, which marks the beginning of pretend play. Thus, it is estimated that between 60 to 65 percent of children have one or two imaginary friends. While it is true that imaginary friends are as common as they are normal, the reasons why they arise vary, as does the time they remain in your child's imagination.

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Why do children have imaginary friends? What are the causes?

Especially because they are tremendously fun. We must not forget that children are naturally imaginative. Exercising their imagination is good for both their mental and emotional health. And children who have imaginary friends truly come to enjoy them, because they always have someone to “play” with when they are bored, or when they just feel lonely.

Sometimes, imaginary friends can also fill a void that other playmates don't have. For example, a child with few friends can create one. Thus, a child who never chooses what to play with when other friends are present can always choose what to play with his imaginary friend. In childhood, having an imaginary friend becomes a unique way to create the perfect friend.

However, it is normal for mom and dad to worry and wonder to what extent it is completely normal. But you should rest assured: you have nothing to worry about when, suddenly, you discover the arrival of an imaginary playmate. And, unlike popular belief, it does not necessarily mean that the child who has imaginary friends longs for the presence of a brother or sister, compensating for their absence.

This is a myth, since it has even been discovered that two-thirds of all children, regardless of whether they have siblings or not, have imaginary friends.

For the child, are imaginary friends truly real?

Indeed, although imaginary friends are not obviously real, most children know that their pretend friends are not. What's more, in young children, fantasy - or imaginary - friends become a sign of imagination development.

For this reason, there is no need to worry if, for example, you make the mistake of sitting right above where your child's imaginary friend was apparently sitting...

But just because it is normal does not mean that we should not pay attention to some basic elements. That is, to what extent the child can play together with his imaginary friend. And what does he do during the game. For example, if suddenly it is the imaginary friend who orders lunch, or breaks things when no one is looking, it is essential to discover some basic rules.

In most cases, we can let our child decide how much he can participate in his fantasy. In this sense, it is very important to respect him and let him take the initiative. For example, if the imaginary friend often travels in the family car, do not ask him if he will do so at that moment, but wait for him to say so.

Once the child has given the go-ahead, it is okay to talk to or about the imaginary friend, although it is important that the child remains in control of his or her own fantasy. Basically because interfering too much could end up causing power struggles, anger or some friction.

When could it become a problem?

If we suddenly discover that the imaginary friend's “demands” begin to get out of place and out of control, it is essential to say no. Although giving your little one a treat can become a good way to bond and show love and respect, it is not advisable to do anything that could cause more stress for us or other family members.

That is, we must not allow the child's imaginary friend to become a form of massive control over the family. For example, putting out an extra plate and glass with imaginary food is fine, but serving a full lunch can send the wrong message.

As many experts believe, imaginary friends only become problematic when the child blames them for their bad behavior. If this happens, it is essential to teach the child that he alone is responsible for whatever he, or his imaginary friend, does.

Another warning sign could be that the child prefers his imaginary friend instead of his real ones. Although this is actually rare, it can be a sign that something else is going on. It is known that children who have imaginary friends generally tend to be much more sociable than other children. But if, suddenly, we notice that the child rejects opportunities to interact with others, preferring to play with his fantasy friend, it is possible to ask how the child is experiencing his own social world.

In any case, in most cases, imaginary friends tend to disappear on their own, especially as children become more interested in playing with other children.