Behaviors you should not have with your child 2026

It is clear that we all make mistakes and we know very well that some educational errors, such as overprotection, scolding them in public or shouting too much, have short and long-term consequences on their behaviors, reactions and personalities.

We must remember that children learn from us, we are mirrors in which they see how we react to different situations in life to learn the appropriate attitudes to have. That is why we must, mainly, take into account the most negative behaviors to avoid them and try to react with assertiveness and patience, so they will assume these forms and put them into practice in their lives, as they grow.

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6 behaviors you should NOT have with your child

These behaviors can generate anxiety, anger, social and family communication problems, low self-esteem and emotional conflicts that will affect the child's personality in childhood and adulthood. That is why it is better that we control these types of attitudes and take them into account when they are small because that is when they shape their self-esteem and personality.

1. Ignore or minimize your child's feelings

When a child expresses his sadness, anger or fear, he is not being capricious, what he feels is real and if you laugh at him or ignore him, if you humiliate him (even if it is not on purpose), you are minimizing his feelings. What children receive when this happens is that what they feel is wrong and that it should not be like this and, furthermore, you stop your love for them and lose the opportunity to reinforce the bond of unconditional love with them.

2. Despise or belittle your other parent

It doesn't matter if you are still together or not: the other parent should never be questioned or belittled. When you do not show love but rather contempt towards your partner, the child does not understand what love is or what it should look like. If the disrespect is constant or permanently threatens divorce or separation, your child will develop an attitude of alertness and permanent anxiety in addition to understanding love as suffering and anguish.

If you are not together as a couple, you must avoid remaining critical, distant or angry with your ex because you are making your child see that that person is the cause of the divorce and that, therefore, he or she has to love you more than the other person and this is never positive for his or her development, since he or she loves you both equally.

3. Interfere in their social relationships

When we get involved in all their decisions and relationships with friends or teachers we are delaying their maturity. If we always intercede for them, we do not allow them to develop skills and mechanisms that allow them to solve and solve their problems on their own, which generates insecurity and low self-esteem, not to mention that they will never learn to manage themselves: something basic for all young people and adults.

4. Make or pretend to make your child an extension of yourself

If you associate what you are as a father or mother, and your skills, with what your child is, his character, his abilities or his friends, they will understand that you love them for what they achieve and not for what they are. This generates low self-esteem in them and they end up worried about pleasing everyone, since they understand that they are not valid because of who they are as a person but rather because of whether they are good enough or not.

5. Overprotect him

We have talked many times about the negative consequences of overprotection and what the most frequent mistakes are. When we protect them from all problems or negative emotions, when we avoid their frustrations or anger all the time, we make the child feel either that they are not capable of solving anything, which reduces their self-esteem, or we create little narcissistic dictators who think they have the right to everything.

In neither case are we preparing them for their future life. Obviously they will have to face a lot of situations in which they will have to take charge of what happens and solve it for themselves, not to mention that they will have to accept their frustrations and overcome them so that they do not drag them into emotions of depression and anxiety when thinking that they will never get what they believe they deserve.

6. Project your frustrations or achievements onto him

Phrases like “you are going to be a pianist like I always wanted, although I couldn't” or “you are good at numbers like I am”; Talking about his tastes to other people with comments like “Dani really likes tennis like his father” or “he's passionate about cars like Mom” prevents the child from developing his own tastes and personality, and he also feels that if he doesn't like something he is letting us down. When it shouldn't be like that at all.

With this type of attitude and also with similar ones, although more hidden, children assume that their tastes and personalities are not so important, which reduces their self-esteem. On the other hand, it also affects them in other aspects such as frustration and communication because how do you tell someone that you don't like something they are passionate about? We subject them to situations of terrible anxiety and nervousness. Therefore, we should never project our frustrations or achievements onto our children, they are different people from us and it is healthy for them to differentiate themselves from us.