These are the qualities that the ideal gynecologist must have 2026

The gynecologist becomes especially important during pregnancy, a period of new developments in which the future mother needs to resolve her doubts with a professional. Additionally, the doctor is the person who has access to the baby through ultrasounds.

What relationship do we establish with our gynecologist? How would we like it to be? What differentiates some professionals from others?

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At such an important moment in our lives we are looking for a good specialist. The difficulty with this is that, unless we are gynecologists, it will be difficult for us to assess his professional competence. Are he good at what he does? Probably yes. Today's gynecologists are very prepared. Sometimes it seems that if the obstetrician is good, everything else is irrelevant. However, the extras are also important.

Let him be close, empathetic «As soon as I enter the consultation, he weighs me down, takes my blood pressure, looks at the analysis and schedules me for the next time. "He doesn't even bother to look at my name on the file," says Carolina, disenchanted. It is one of the most common complaints among pregnant women, the coldness and distance that some professionals show.

However, the nearby gynecologist changes everything: «I told him that I had pain in my pelvis, and he told me: "Poor thing, it does hurt, let's see what we can do", and feeling understood felt great. Pregnancy causes discomfort, sometimes a lot of discomfort, and there is usually a lot of misunderstanding," recalls Marta. Relatively common phrases such as "having thought about it before" reflect a great lack of empathy.

Is it really important? Is the doctor's attitude relevant to the development of pregnancy? "When the professional is not accessible, you don't dare to ask, you may hide things from them due to lack of trust and the visit can be stressful," says Alejandra, a new mother. «The attitude of the professional, the way he treats the woman or how he offers her information can generate stress or peace of mind. "Human suffering is not something purely biological and through medicine we have to take care of all aspects of the person," he says.

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You must share your knowledge with us

"There is nothing more distressing than a prolonged silence during an ultrasound, your heart, your spleen... We were involved in everything," he recalls.

There will be women for whom “everything is fine” is enough, especially if it is not their first pregnancy. But many others leave the consultation with a bag of unanswered questions. "As soon as I left, I called a friend and mother and asked her any questions about what the doctor had told me," says Carolina. "And if they are important, I make an appointment with my private gynecologist," she admits.

Dr. Al Adib, who also runs a private practice in Almendralejo and Zafra, often encounters this situation: «Women come to my office with an appropriate diagnosis; At first it was difficult for me to understand why they came, over time I saw that they needed someone to explain this diagnosis to them and what options they had to deal with the situation.

The importance of knowing how to calm down

Today we know a lot, we read a lot and we are perfectly aware of the dangers that lie in wait for us. When María went to a gynecologist for a third, unplanned pregnancy, after two cesarean sections, the professional's alarmism made her rush out the door, but not before swallowing a big rant about her enormous irresponsibility. «I knew that the situation was not ideal and precisely for that reason I would have appreciated the contrary words, something like: "Calm down, everything is going to be fine." It is what you expect and need, the opposite attitude can only increase your anxiety and therefore harm your pregnancy," he reflects. María looked for another gynecologist and fortunately both the third pregnancy and the cesarean delivery passed without complications.

Look for a gynecologist who will not deceive you

Don't even ridicule. The state of good hope makes us very vulnerable and sometimes we endure treatment that we would not tolerate at another stage of our life. "I was afraid to go to the gynecologist's office, once he scolded me for having gained a lot of weight and I always went nervous," Inés admits. On the other hand, Alejandra, who had been embarrassed to ask, found great support in her gynecologist: "Every time I said I was going to ask him something stupid, he told me that it wasn't stupid," she says.

The gynecologist you choose should be in tune with your birth philosophy

(Especially if you are going to attend to it). It does not mean that you think the same as us, but it does mean that you are respectful of our choice. If we want to give an epidural, don't judge us; and if we don't want to put it in, neither. "I would love to take my birth plan to my gynecologist, ask him for help in preparing it, but I know that he will not be welcome," says Carolina.

If you are going to care for us during childbirth, we must be well informed of your philosophy. "I had a very good relationship with my gynecologist, but at the end of the pregnancy I realized that his approach was different from mine, especially when it came to who makes the decisions; every time I told him how I wanted my birth to be, he told me: 'Well, we'll see,'" says Gracia.

Don't let me decide for you

What is best for the patient and who decides? «For more than 1,000 years we have accepted that the doctor must seek the good of the patient and we have let him decide. For a few decades we have had the Principle of Autonomy, which says that the patient can decide what is best for him.

The professional must always put his or her knowledge at our service, but when there are several options (and this is usually the case), the patient has the right to decide what he or she believes is best for him," summarizes gynecologist Miriam Al Adib in Almendralejo. We therefore have the last word when it comes to our health (and that of our child). We have it in theory, and increasingly in practice.